Walk

Walk 1

Shuffling across the tarmac, my arm around her shoulder to steady her; she’s less sure of her footing now since the fall. Her eyes flit vacantly from my face to the gardens not settling anywhere, recognising nothing.

When did she become so short? She fits uncomfortably under my arm which aches from the burden of supporting her. Our slow progress across the ten yard stretch reminds me of ‘pigeon steps’, the game we played at school – but this is no game now, this is my life.

I enter the security code and, as the door opens, we’re greeted by the warm fug and the overpowering smell of bleach, urine and institutional food. She’s back to the place we now refer to as her home. And the weight immediately lifts from my shoulders.


Walk 2

Concentrate.
Start by standing upright.
Whoa – steady girl!
Okay, this isn’t working. Let’s be less ambitious.
A Neanderthal crouch will have to do….
Straighten up slowly…
O wow, this is high.
The view’s completely different from up here.
Wobble. Woops – this is scary! So close to a serious fall.
How do people do this for a living?
Keep calm and don’t rush things.
One foot in front of the other, that’s all it takes.
Don’t even think about going for a confident, blasé look - you know you can’t pull it off.
Just don’t cling on to things – that’s a dead give away you’ve not done this before.
Okay. The plan is 3 steps forward, pause, take a look, turn around and retreat to safety.
Come on. Be brave. You can do it. It’s not that far.
Deep breath.
One step…Oh er, my legs are shaking.
I’m going to twist my bloody ankle if I don’t watch what I’m doing and it’s a long fall from up here.
Slowly. Carefully. One step for mankind and all that.
Oh you know what? I think I’ve almost got the hang of this. (Pride before a fall?)
Maybe I could even raise my head and take a look?
Hmm – not quite what I’d imagined.
Nothing like it looks in the pictures in the magazines, but then it never is – reality.
Right. That’s enough.
Three steps back to terra firma.
But at least you can say you had the experience if only for 5 minutes.